The Vision of Judgement

1. 1Saint Peter sat by the celestial gate:
2. 2His keys were rusty, and the lock was dull,
3. 3So little trouble had been given of late;
4. 4Not that the place by any means was full,
5. 5But since the Gallic era "eighty-eight"
6. 6The Devils had ta'en a longer, stronger pull,
7. 7And "a pull altogether," as they say
8. 8At sea--which drew most souls another way.

1. 9The Angels all were singing out of tune,
2. 10And hoarse with having little else to do,
3. 11Excepting to wind up the sun and moon,
4. 12Or curb a runaway young star or two,
5. 13Or wild colt of a comet, which too soon
6. 14Broke out of bounds o'er the ethereal blue,
7. 15Splitting some planet with its playful tail,
8. 16As boats are sometimes by a wanton whale.

1. 17The Guardian Seraphs had retired on high,
2. 18Finding their charges past all care below;
3. 19Terrestrial business filled nought in the sky
4. 20Save the Recording Angel's black bureau;
5. 21Who found, indeed, the facts to multiply
6. 22With such rapidity of vice and woe,
7. 23That he had stripped off both his wings in quills,
8. 24And yet was in arrear of human ills.

1. 25His business so augmented of late years,
2. 26That he was forced, against his will, no doubt,
3. 27(Just like those cherubs, earthly ministers,)
4. 28For some resource to turn himself about,
5. 29And claim the help of his celestial peers,
6. 30To aid him ere he should be quite worn out
7. 31By the increased demand for his remarks:
8. 32Six Angels and twelve Saints were named his clerks.

1. 33This was a handsome board--at least for Heaven;
2. 34And yet they had even then enough to do,
3. 35So many Conquerors' cars were daily driven,
4. 36So many kingdoms fitted up anew;
5. 37Each day, too, slew its thousands six or seven,
6. 38Till at the crowning carnage, Waterloo,
7. 39They threw their pens down in divine disgust--
8. 40The page was so besmeared with blood and dust.

1. 41This by the way; 'tis not mine to record
2. 42What Angels shrink from: even the very Devil
3. 43On this occasion his own work abhorred,
4. 44So surfeited with the infernal revel:
5. 45Though he himself had sharpened every sword,
6. 46It almost quenched his innate thirst of evil.
7. 47(Here Satan's sole good work deserves insertion--
8. 48'Tis, that he has both Generals in reversion.)

1. 49Let's skip a few short years of hollow peace,
2. 50Which peopled earth no better, Hell as wont,
3. 51And Heaven none--they form the tyrant's lease,
4. 52With nothing but new names subscribed upon't;
5. 53'Twill one day finish: meantime they increase,
6. 54"With seven heads and ten horns," and all in front,
7. 55Like Saint John's foretold beast; but ours are born
8. 56Less formidable in the head than horn.

1. 57In the first year of Freedom's second dawn
2. 58Died George the Third; although no tyrant, one
3. 59Who shielded tyrants, till each sense withdrawn
4. 60Left him nor mental nor external sun:
5. 61A better farmer ne'er brushed dew from lawn,
6. 62A worse king never left a realm undone!
7. 63He died--but left his subjects still behind,
8. 64One half as mad--and t'other no less blind.

1. 65He died! his death made no great stir on earth:
2. 66His burial made some pomp; there was profusion
3. 67Of velvet--gilding--brass--and no great dearth
4. 68Of aught but tears--save those shed by collusion:
5. 69For these things may be bought at their true worth;
6. 70Of elegy there was the due infusion--
7. 71Bought also; and the torches, cloaks and banners,
8. 72Heralds, and relics of old Gothic manners,

1. 73Formed a sepulchral melodrame. Of all
2. 74The fools who flocked to swell or see the show,
3. 75Who cared about the corpse? The funeral
4. 76Made the attraction, and the black the woe,
5. 77There throbbed not there a thought which pierced the pall;
6. 78And when the gorgeous coffin was laid low,
7. 79It seemed the mockery of hell to fold
8. 80The rottenness of eighty years in gold.

1. 81So mix his body with the dust! It might
2. 82Return to what it must far sooner, were
3. 83The natural compound left alone to fight
4. 84Its way back into earth, and fire, and air;
5. 85But the unnatural balsams merely blight
6. 86What Nature made him at his birth, as bare
7. 87As the mere million's base unmummied clay--
8. 88Yet all his spices but prolong decay.

1. 89He's dead--and upper earth with him has done;
2. 90He's buried; save the undertaker's bill,
3. 91Or lapidary scrawl, the world is gone
4. 92For him, unless he left a German will:
5. 93But where's the proctor who will ask his son?
6. 94In whom his qualities are reigning still,
7. 95Except that household virtue, most uncommon,
8. 96Of constancy to a bad, ugly woman.

1. 97"God save the king!" It is a large economy
2. 98In God to save the like; but if he will
3. 99Be saving, all the better; for not one am I
4. 100Of those who think damnation better still:
5. 101I hardly know too if not quite alone am I
6. 102In this small hope of bettering future ill
7. 103By circumscribing, with some slight restriction,
8. 104The eternity of Hell's hot jurisdiction.

1. 105I know this is unpopular; I know
2. 106'Tis blasphemous; I know one may be damned
3. 107For hoping no one else may e'er be so;
4. 108I know my catechism; I know we're crammed
5. 109With the best doctrines till we quite o'erflow;
6. 110I know that all save England's Church have shammed,
7. 111And that the other twice two hundred churches
8. 112And synagogues have made a damned bad purchase.

1. 113God help us all! God help me too! I am,
2. 114God knows, as helpless as the Devil can wish,
3. 115And not a whit more difficult to damn,
4. 116Than is to bring to land a late-hooked fish,
5. 117Or to the butcher to purvey the lamb;
6. 118Not that I'm fit for such a noble dish,
7. 119As one day will be that immortal fry
8. 120Of almost every body born to die.

1. 121Saint Peter sat by the celestial gate,
2. 122And nodded o'er his keys: when, lo! there came
3. 123A wondrous noise he had not heard of late--
4. 124A rushing sound of wind, and stream, and flame;
5. 125In short, a roar of things extremely great,
6. 126Which would have made aught save a Saint exclaim;
7. 127But he, with first a start and then a wink,
8. 128Said, "There's another star gone out, I think!"

1. 129But ere he could return to his repose,
2. 130A Cherub flapped his right wing o'er his eyes--
3. 131At which Saint Peter yawned, and rubbed his nose:
4. 132"Saint porter," said the angel, "prithee rise!"
5. 133Waving a goodly wing, which glowed, as glows
6. 134An earthly peacock's tail, with heavenly dyes:
7. 135To which the saint replied, "Well, what's the matter?
8. 136"Is Lucifer come back with all this clatter?"

1. 137"No," quoth the Cherub: "George the Third is dead."
2. 138"And who is George the Third?" replied the apostle:
3. 139"What George? what Third?" "The King of England," said
4. 140The angel. "Well! he won't find kings to jostle
5. 141Him on his way; but does he wear his head?
6. 142Because the last we saw here had a tustle,
7. 143And ne'er would have got into Heaven's good graces,
8. 144Had he not flung his head in all our faces.

1. 145"He was--if I remember--King of France;
2. 146That head of his, which could not keep a crown
3. 147On earth, yet ventured in my face to advance
4. 148A claim to those of martyrs--like my own:
5. 149If I had had my sword, as I had once
6. 150When I cut ears off, I had cut him down;
7. 151But having but my keys, and not my brand,
8. 152I only knocked his head from out his hand.

1. 153"And then he set up such a headless howl,
2. 154That all the Saints came out and took him in;
3. 155And there he sits by Saint Paul, cheek by jowl;
4. 156That fellow Paul--the parvenù! The skin
5. 157Of Saint Bartholomew, which makes his cowl
6. 158In heaven, and upon earth redeemed his sin,
7. 159So as to make a martyr, never sped
8. 160Better than did this weak and wooden head.

1. 161"But had it come up here upon its shoulders,
2. 162There would have been a different tale to tell:
3. 163The fellow-feeling in the Saint's beholders
4. 164Seems to have acted on them like a spell;
5. 165And so this very foolish head Heaven solders
6. 166Back on its trunk: it may be very well,
7. 167And seems the custom here to overthrow
8. 168Whatever has been wisely done below."

1. 169The Angel answered, "Peter! do not pout:
2. 170The King who comes has head and all entire,
3. 171And never knew much what it was about--
4. 172He did as doth the puppet--by its wire,
5. 173And will be judged like all the rest, no doubt:
6. 174My business and your own is not to inquire
7. 175Into such matters, but to mind our cue--
8. 176Which is to act as we are bid to do."

1. 177While thus they spake, the angelic caravan,
2. 178Arriving like a rush of mighty wind,
3. 179Cleaving the fields of space, as doth the swan
4. 180Some silver stream (say Ganges, Nile, or Inde,
5. 181Or Thames, or Tweed), and midst them an old man
6. 182With an old soul, and both extremely blind,
7. 183Halted before the gate, and, in his shroud,
8. 184Seated their fellow-traveller on a cloud.

1. 185But bringing up the rear of this bright host
2. 186A Spirit of a different aspect waved
3. 187His wings, like thunder-clouds above some coast
4. 188Whose barren beach with frequent wrecks is paved;
5. 189His brow was like the deep when tempest-tossed;
6. 190Fierce and unfathomable thoughts engraved
7. 191Eternal wrath on his immortal face,
8. 192And where he gazed a gloom pervaded space.

1. 193As he drew near, he gazed upon the gate
2. 194Ne'er to be entered more by him or Sin,
3. 195With such a glance of supernatural hate,
4. 196As made Saint Peter wish himself within;
5. 197He pottered with his keys at a great rate,
6. 198And sweated through his Apostolic skin:
7. 199Of course his perspiration was but ichor,
8. 200Or some such other spiritual liquor.

1. 201The very Cherubs huddled all together,
2. 202Like birds when soars the falcon; and they felt
3. 203A tingling to the tip of every feather,
4. 204And formed a circle like Orion's belt
5. 205Around their poor old charge; who scarce knew whither
6. 206His guards had led him, though they gently dealt
7. 207With royal Manes (for by many stories,
8. 208And true, we learn the Angels all are Tories).

1. 209As things were in this posture, the gate flew
2. 210Asunder, and the flashing of its hinges
3. 211Flung over space an universal hue
4. 212Of many-coloured flame, until its tinges
5. 213Reached even our speck of earth, and made a new
6. 214Aurora borealis spread its fringes
7. 215O'er the North Pole; the same seen, when ice-bound,
8. 216By Captain Parry's crew, in "Melville's Sound."

1. 217And from the gate thrown open issued beaming
2. 218A beautiful and mighty Thing of Light,
3. 219Radiant with glory, like a banner streaming
4. 220Victorious from some world-o'erthrowing fight:
5. 221My poor comparisons must needs be teeming
6. 222With earthly likenesses, for here the night
7. 223Of clay obscures our best conceptions, saving
8. 224Johanna Southcote, or Bob Southey raving.

1. 225'Twas the Archangel Michael: all men know
2. 226The make of Angels and Archangels, since
3. 227There's scarce a scribbler has not one to show,
4. 228From the fiends' leader to the Angels' Prince.
5. 229There also are some altar-pieces, though
6. 230I really can't say that they much evince
7. 231One's inner notions of immortal spirits;
8. 232But let the connoisseurs explain their merits.

1. 233Michael flew forth in glory and in good;
2. 234A goodly work of him from whom all Glory
3. 235And Good arise; the portal past--he stood;
4. 236Before him the young Cherubs and Saints hoary--
5. 237(I say young, begging to be understood
6. 238By looks, not years; and should be very sorry
7. 239To state, they were not older than St. Peter,
8. 240But merely that they seemed a little sweeter).

1. 241The Cherubs and the Saints bowed down before
2. 242That arch-angelic Hierarch, the first
3. 243Of Essences angelical who wore
4. 244The aspect of a god; but this ne'er nursed
5. 245Pride in his heavenly bosom, in whose core
6. 246No thought, save for his Maker's service, durst
7. 247Intrude, however glorified and high;
8. 248He knew him but the Viceroy of the sky.

1. 249He and the sombre, silent Spirit met--
2. 250They knew each other both for good and ill;
3. 251Such was their power, that neither could forget
4. 252His former friend and future foe; but still
5. 253There was a high, immortal, proud regret
6. 254In either's eye, as if 'twere less their will
7. 255Than destiny to make the eternal years
8. 256Their date of war, and their "Champ Clos" the spheres.

1. 257But here they were in neutral space: we know
2. 258From Job, that Satan hath the power to pay
3. 259A heavenly visit thrice a-year or so;
4. 260And that the "Sons of God," like those of clay,
5. 261Must keep him company; and we might show
6. 262From the same book, in how polite a way
7. 263The dialogue is held between the Powers
8. 264Of Good and Evil--but 'twould take up hours.

1. 265And this is not a theologic tract,
2. 266To prove with Hebrew and with Arabic,
3. 267If Job be allegory or a fact,
4. 268But a true narrative; and thus I pick
5. 269From out the whole but such and such an act
6. 270As sets aside the slightest thought of trick.
7. 271'Tis every tittle true, beyond suspicion,
8. 272And accurate as any other vision.

1. 273The spirits were in neutral space, before
2. 274The gate of Heaven; like eastern thresholds is
3. 275The place where Death's grand cause is argued o'er,
4. 276And souls despatched to that world or to this;
5. 277And therefore Michael and the other wore
6. 278A civil aspect: though they did not kiss,
7. 279Yet still between his Darkness and his Brightness
8. 280There passed a mutual glance of great politeness.

1. 281The Archangel bowed, not like a modern beau,
2. 282But with a graceful oriental bend,
3. 283Pressing one radiant arm just where below
4. 284The heart in good men is supposed to tend;
5. 285He turned as to an equal, not too low,
6. 286But kindly; Satan met his ancient friend
7. 287With more hauteur, as might an old Castilian
8. 288Poor Noble meet a mushroom rich civilian.

1. 289He merely bent his diabolic brow
2. 290An instant; and then raising it, he stood
3. 291In act to assert his right or wrong, and show
4. 292Cause why King George by no means could or should
5. 293Make out a case to be exempt from woe
6. 294Eternal, more than other kings, endued
7. 295With better sense and hearts, whom History mentions,
8. 296Who long have "paved Hell with their good intentions."

1. 297Michael began: "What wouldst thou with this man,
2. 298Now dead, and brought before the Lord? What ill
3. 299Hath he wrought since his mortal race began,
4. 300That thou canst claim him? Speak! and do thy will,
5. 301If it be just: if in this earthly span
6. 302He hath been greatly failing to fulfil
7. 303His duties as a king and mortal, say,
8. 304And he is thine; if not--let him have way."

1. 305"Michael!" replied the Prince of Air, "even here
2. 306Before the gate of Him thou servest, must
3. 307I claim my subject: and will make appear
4. 308That as he was my worshipper in dust,
5. 309So shall he be in spirit, although dear
6. 310To thee and thine, because nor wine nor lust
7. 311Were of his weaknesses; yet on the throne
8. 312He reigned o'er millions to serve me alone.

1. 313"Look to our earth, or rather mine; it was,
2. 314Once, more thy master's: but I triumph not
3. 315In this poor planet's conquest; nor, alas!
4. 316Need he thou servest envy me my lot:
5. 317With all the myriads of bright worlds which pass
6. 318In worship round him, he may have forgot
7. 319Yon weak creation of such paltry things:
8. 320I think few worth damnation save their kings,

1. 321"And these but as a kind of quit-rent, to
2. 322Assert my right as Lord: and even had
3. 323I such an inclination,'twere (as you
4. 324Well know) superfluous; they are grown so bad,
5. 325That Hell has nothing better left to do
6. 326Than leave them to themselves: so much more mad
7. 327And evil by their own internal curse,
8. 328Heaven cannot make them better, nor I worse.

1. 329"Look to the earth, I said, and say again:
2. 330When this old, blind, mad, helpless, weak, poor worm
3. 331Began in youth's first bloom and flush to reign,
4. 332The world and he both wore a different form,
5. 333And much of earth and all the watery plain
6. 334Of Ocean called him king: through many a storm
7. 335His isles had floated on the abyss of Time;
8. 336For the rough virtues chose them for their clime.

1. 337"He came to his sceptre young; he leaves it old:
2. 338Look to the state in which he found his realm,
3. 339And left it; and his annals too behold,
4. 340How to a minion first he gave the helm;
5. 341How grew upon his heart a thirst for gold,
6. 342The beggar's vice, which can but overwhelm
7. 343The meanest hearts; and for the rest, but glance
8. 344Thine eye along America and France.

1. 345"'Tis true, he was a tool from first to last
2. 346(I have the workmen safe); but as a tool
3. 347So let him be consumed. From out the past
4. 348Of ages, since mankind have known the rule
5. 349Of monarchs--from the bloody rolls amassed
6. 350Of Sin and Slaughter--from the Cæsars' school,
7. 351Take the worst pupil; and produce a reign
8. 352More drenched with gore, more cumbered with the slain.

1. 353"He ever warred with freedom and the free:
2. 354Nations as men, home subjects, foreign foes,
3. 355So that they uttered the word 'Liberty!'
4. 356Found George the Third their first opponent. Whose
5. 357History was ever stained as his will be
6. 358With national and individual woes?
7. 359I grant his household abstinence; I grant
8. 360His neutral virtues, which most monarchs want;

1. 361"I know he was a constant consort; own
2. 362He was a decent sire, and middling lord.
3. 363All this is much, and most upon a throne;
4. 364As temperance, if at Apicius' board,
5. 365Is more than at an anchorite's supper shown.
6. 366I grant him all the kindest can accord;
7. 367And this was well for him, but not for those
8. 368Millions who found him what Oppression chose.

1. 369"The New World shook him off; the Old yet groans
2. 370Beneath what he and his prepared, if not
3. 371Completed: he leaves heirs on many thrones
4. 372To all his vices, without what begot
5. 373Compassion for him--his tame virtues; drones
6. 374Who sleep, or despots who have now forgot
7. 375A lesson which shall be re-taught them, wake
8. 376Upon the thrones of earth; but let them quake!

1. 377"Five millions of the primitive, who hold
2. 378The faith which makes ye great on earth, implored
3. 379A part of that vast all they held of old,--
4. 380Freedom to worship--not alone your Lord,
5. 381Michael, but you, and you, Saint Peter! Cold
6. 382Must be your souls, if you have not abhorred
7. 383The foe to Catholic participation
8. 384In all the license of a Christian nation.

1. 385"True! he allowed them to pray God; but as
2. 386A consequence of prayer, refused the law
3. 387Which would have placed them upon the same base
4. 388With those who did not hold the Saints in awe."
5. 389But here Saint Peter started from his place
6. 390And cried, "You may the prisoner withdraw:
7. 391Ere Heaven shall ope her portals to this Guelph,
8. 392While I am guard, may I be damned myself!

1. 393"Sooner will I with Cerberus exchange
2. 394My office (and his is no sinecure)
3. 395Than see this royal Bedlam-bigot range
4. 396The azure fields of Heaven, of that be sure!"
5. 397"Saint!" replied Satan, "you do well to avenge
6. 398The wrongs he made your satellites endure;
7. 399And if to this exchange you should be given,
8. 400I'll try to coax our Cerberus up to Heaven!"

1. 401Here Michael interposed: "Good Saint! and Devil!
2. 402Pray, not so fast; you both outrun discretion.
3. 403Saint Peter! you were wont to be more civil:
4. 404Satan! excuse this warmth of his expression,
5. 405And condescension to the vulgar's level:
6. 406Even Saints sometimes forget themselves in session.
7. 407Have you got more to say?"--"No."--"If you please,
8. 408I'll trouble you to call your witnesses."

1. 409Then Satan turned and waved his swarthy hand,
2. 410Which stirred with its electric qualities
3. 411Clouds farther off than we can understand,
4. 412Although we find him sometimes in our skies;
5. 413Infernal thunder shook both sea and land
6. 414In all the planets--and Hell's batteries
7. 415Let off the artillery, which Milton mentions
8. 416As one of Satan's most sublime inventions.

1. 417This was a signal unto such damned souls
2. 418As have the privilege of their damnation
3. 419Extended far beyond the mere controls
4. 420Of worlds past, present, or to come; no station
5. 421Is theirs particularly in the rolls
6. 422Of Hell assigned; but where their inclination
7. 423Or business carries them in search of game,
8. 424They may range freely--being damned the same.

1. 425They are proud of this--as very well they may,
2. 426It being a sort of knighthood, or gilt key
3. 427Stuck in their loins; or like to an "entré"
4. 428Up the back stairs, or such free-masonry.
5. 429I borrow my comparisons from clay,
6. 430Being clay myself. Let not those spirits be
7. 431Offended with such base low likenesses;
8. 432We know their posts are nobler far than these.

1. 433When the great signal ran from Heaven to Hell--
2. 434About ten million times the distance reckoned
3. 435From our sun to its earth, as we can tell
4. 436How much time it takes up, even to a second,
5. 437For every ray that travels to dispel
6. 438The fogs of London, through which, dimly beaconed,
7. 439The weathercocks are gilt some thrice a year,
8. 440If that the summer is not too severe:

1. 441I say that I can tell--'twas half a minute;
2. 442I know the solar beams take up more time
3. 443Ere, packed up for their journey, they begin it;
4. 444But then their Telegraph is less sublime,
5. 445And if they ran a race, they would not win it
6. 446'Gainst Satan's couriers bound for their own clime.
7. 447The sun takes up some years for every ray
8. 448To reach its goal--the Devil not half a day.

1. 449Upon the verge of space, about the size
2. 450Of half-a-crown, a little speck appeared
3. 451(I've seen a something like it in the skies
4. 452In the Ægean, ere a squall); it neared,
5. 453And, growing bigger, took another guise;
6. 454Like an aërial ship it tacked, and steered,
7. 455Or was steered (I am doubtful of the grammar
8. 456Of the last phrase, which makes the stanza stammer;

1. 457But take your choice): and then it grew a cloud;
2. 458And so it was--a cloud of witnesses.
3. 459But such a cloud! No land ere saw a crowd
4. 460Of locusts numerous as the heavens saw these;
5. 461They shadowed with their myriads Space; their loud
6. 462And varied cries were like those of wild geese,
7. 463(If nations may be likened to a goose),
8. 464And realised the phrase of "Hell broke loose."

1. 465Here crashed a sturdy oath of stout John Bull,
2. 466Who damned away his eyes as heretofore:
3. 467There Paddy brogued "By Jasus!"--"What's your wull?"
4. 468The temperate Scot exclaimed: the French ghost swore
5. 469In certain terms I shan't translate in full,
6. 470As the first coachman will; and 'midst the war,
7. 471The voice of Jonathan was heard to express,
8. 472"Our President is going to war, I guess."

1. 473Besides there were the Spaniard, Dutch, and Dane;
2. 474In short, an universal shoal of shades
3. 475From Otaheite's isle to Salisbury Plain,
4. 476Of all climes and professions, years and trades,
5. 477Ready to swear against the good king's reign,
6. 478Bitter as clubs in cards are against spades:
7. 479All summoned by this grand "subpoena," to
8. 480Try if kings mayn't be damned like me or you.

1. 481When Michael saw this host, he first grew pale,
2. 482As Angels can; next, like Italian twilight,
3. 483He turned all colours--as a peacock's tail,
4. 484Or sunset streaming through a Gothic skylight
5. 485In some old abbey, or a trout not stale,
6. 486Or distant lightning on the horizon by night,
7. 487Or a fresh rainbow, or a grand review
8. 488Of thirty regiments in red, green, and blue.

1. 489Then he addressed himself to Satan: "Why--
2. 490My good old friend, for such I deem you, though
3. 491Our different parties make us fight so shy,
4. 492I ne'er mistake you for a personal foe;
5. 493Our difference political, and I
6. 494Trust that, whatever may occur below,
7. 495You know my great respect for you: and this
8. 496Makes me regret whate'er you do amiss--

1. 497"Why, my dear Lucifer, would you abuse
2. 498My call for witnesses? I did not mean
3. 499That you should half of Earth and Hell produce;
4. 500'Tis even superfluous, since two honest, clean,
5. 501True testimonies are enough: we lose
6. 502Our Time, nay, our Eternity, between
7. 503The accusation and defence: if we
8. 504Hear both, 'twill stretch our immortality."

1. 505Satan replied, "To me the matter is
2. 506Indifferent, in a personal point of view:
3. 507I can have fifty better souls than this
4. 508With far less trouble than we have gone through
5. 509Already; and I merely argued his
6. 510Late Majesty of Britain's case with you
7. 511Upon a point of form: you may dispose
8. 512Of him; I've kings enough below, God knows!"

1. 513Thus spoke the Demon (late called "multifaced"
2. 514By multo-scribbling Southey). "Then we'll call
3. 515One or two persons of the myriads placed
4. 516Around our congress, and dispense with all
5. 517The rest," quoth Michael: "Who may be so graced
6. 518As to speak first? there's choice enough--who shall
7. 519It be?" Then Satan answered, "There are many;
8. 520But you may choose Jack Wilkes as well as any."

1. 521A merry, cock-eyed, curious-looking Sprite
2. 522Upon the instant started from the throng,
3. 523Dressed in a fashion now forgotten quite;
4. 524For all the fashions of the flesh stick long
5. 525By people in the next world; where unite
6. 526All the costumes since Adam's, right or wrong,
7. 527From Eve's fig-leaf down to the petticoat,
8. 528Almost as scanty, of days less remote.

1. 529The Spirit looked around upon the crowds
2. 530Assembled, and exclaimed, "My friends of all
3. 531The spheres, we shall catch cold amongst these clouds;
4. 532So let's to business: why this general call?
5. 533If those are freeholders I see in shrouds,
6. 534And 'tis for an election that they bawl,
7. 535Behold a candidate with unturned coat!
8. 536Saint Peter, may I count upon your vote?"

1. 537"Sir," replied Michael, "you mistake; these things
2. 538Are of a former life, and what we do
3. 539Above is more august; to judge of kings
4. 540Is the tribunal met: so now you know."
5. 541"Then I presume those gentlemen with wings,"
6. 542Said Wilkes, "are Cherubs; and that soul below
7. 543Looks much like George the Third, but to my mind
8. 544A good deal older--bless me! is he blind?"

1. 545"He is what you behold him, and his doom
2. 546Depends upon his deeds," the Angel said;
3. 547"If you have aught to arraign in him, the tomb
4. 548Gives license to the humblest beggar's head
5. 549To lift itself against the loftiest."--"Some,"
6. 550Said Wilkes, "don't wait to see them laid in lead,
7. 551For such a liberty--and I, for one,
8. 552Have told them what I thought beneath the sun."

1. 553"Above the sun repeat, then, what thou hast
2. 554To urge against him," said the Archangel. "Why,"
3. 555Replied the spirit, "since old scores are past,
4. 556Must I turn evidence? In faith, not I.
5. 557Besides, I beat him hollow at the last ,
6. 558With all his Lords and Commons: in the sky
7. 559I don't like ripping up old stories, since
8. 560His conduct was but natural in a prince.

1. 561"Foolish, no doubt, and wicked, to oppress
2. 562A poor unlucky devil without a shilling;
3. 563But then I blame the man himself much less
4. 564Than Bute and Grafton , and shall be unwilling
5. 565To see him punished here for their excess,
6. 566Since they were both damned long ago, and still in
7. 567Their place below: for me, I have forgiven,
8. 568And vote his habeas corpus into Heaven."

1. 569"Wilkes," said the Devil, "I understand all this;
2. 570You turned to half a courtier ere you died,
3. 571And seem to think it would not be amiss
4. 572To grow a whole one on the other side
5. 573Of Charon's ferry; you forget that his
6. 574Reign is concluded; whatsoe'er betide,
7. 575He won't be sovereign more: you've lost your labour,
8. 576For at the best he will but be your neighbour.

1. 577"However, I knew what to think of it,
2. 578When I beheld you in your jesting way,
3. 579Flitting and whispering round about the spit
4. 580Where Belial, upon duty for the day ,
5. 581With Fox's lard was basting William Pitt,
6. 582His pupil; I knew what to think, I say:
7. 583That fellow even in Hell breeds farther ills;
8. 584I'll have him gagged--'twas one of his own Bills .

1. 585"Call Junius!" From the crowd a shadow stalked .
2. 586And at the name there was a general squeeze,
3. 587So that the very ghosts no longer walked
4. 588In comfort, at their own aërial ease,
5. 589But were all rammed, and jammed (but to be balked,
6. 590As we shall see), and jostled hands and knees,
7. 591Like wind compressed and pent within a bladder,
8. 592Or like a human colic, which is sadder.

1. 593The shadow came--a tall, thin, grey-haired figure,
2. 594That looked as it had been a shade on earth ;
3. 595Quick in its motions, with an air of vigour,
4. 596But nought to mark its breeding or its birth;
5. 597Now it waxed little, then again grew bigger ,
6. 598With now an air of gloom, or savage mirth:
7. 599But as you gazed upon its features, they
8. 600Changed every instant--to what, none could say.

1. 601The more intently the ghosts gazed, the less
2. 602Could they distinguish whose the features were;
3. 603The Devil himself seemed puzzled even to guess;
4. 604They varied like a dream--now here, now there;
5. 605And several people swore from out the press,
6. 606They knew him perfectly; and one could swear
7. 607He was his father; upon which another
8. 608Was sure he was his mother's cousin's brother:

1. 609Another, that he was a duke, or knight,
2. 610An orator, a lawyer, or a priest,
3. 611A nabob, a man-midwife; but the wight
4. 612Mysterious changed his countenance at least
5. 613As oft as they their minds: though in full sight
6. 614He stood, the puzzle only was increased;
7. 615The man was a phantasmagoria in
8. 616Himself--he was so volatile and thin.

1. 617The moment that you had pronounced him one,
2. 618Presto! his face changed, and he was another;
3. 619And when that change was hardly well put on,
4. 620It varied, till I don't think his own mother
5. 621(If that he had a mother) would her son
6. 622Have known, he shifted so from one to t'other;
7. 623Till guessing from a pleasure grew a task,
8. 624At this epistolary "Iron Mask."

1. 625For sometimes he like Cerberus would seem--
2. 626"Three gentlemen at once" (as sagely says
3. 627Good Mrs. Malaprop); then you might deem
4. 628That he was not even one; now many rays
5. 629Were flashing round him; and now a thick steam
6. 630Hid him from sight--like fogs on London days:
7. 631Now Burke, now Tooke, he grew to people's fancies
8. 632And certes often like Sir Philip Francis.

1. 633I've an hypothesis--'tis quite my own;
2. 634I never let it out till now, for fear
3. 635Of doing people harm about the throne,
4. 636And injuring some minister or peer,
5. 637On whom the stigma might perhaps be blown;
6. 638It is--my gentle public, lend thine ear!
7. 639'Tis, that what Junius we are wont to call,
8. 640Was really--truly--nobody at all.

1. 641I don't see wherefore letters should not be
2. 642Written without hands, since we daily view
3. 643Them written without heads; and books, we see,
4. 644Are filled as well without the latter too:
5. 645And really till we fix on somebody
6. 646For certain sure to claim them as his due,
7. 647Their author, like the Niger's mouth, will bother
8. 648The world to say if there be mouth or author.

1. 649"And who and what art thou?" the Archangel said.
2. 650"For that you may consult my title-page,"
3. 651Replied this mighty shadow of a shade:
4. 652"If I have kept my secret half an age,
5. 653I scarce shall tell it now."--"Canst thou upbraid,"
6. 654Continued Michael, "George Rex, or allege
7. 655Aught further?" Junius answered, "You had better
8. 656First ask him for his answer to my letter:

1. 657"My charges upon record will outlast
2. 658The brass of both his epitaph and tomb."
3. 659"Repent'st thou not," said Michael, "of some past
4. 660Exaggeration? something which may doom
5. 661Thyself if false, as him if true? Thou wast
6. 662Too bitter--is it not so?--in thy gloom
7. 663Of passion?"--"Passion!" cried the phantom dim,
8. 664"I loved my country, and I hated him.

1. 665"What I have written, I have written: let
2. 666The rest be on his head or mine!" So spoke
3. 667Old "Nominis Umbra;" and while speaking yet,
4. 668Away he melted in celestial smoke.
5. 669Then Satan said to Michael, "Don't forget
6. 670To call George Washington, and John Horne Tooke,
7. 671And Franklin;" --but at this time there was heard
8. 672A cry for room, though not a phantom stirred.

1. 673At length with jostling, elbowing, and the aid
2. 674Of Cherubim appointed to that post,
3. 675The devil Asmodeus to the circle made
4. 676His way, and looked as if his journey cost
5. 677Some trouble. When his burden down he laid,
6. 678"What's this?" cried Michael; "why, 'tis not a ghost?"
7. 679"I know it," quoth the Incubus; "but he
8. 680Shall be one, if you leave the affair to me.

1. 681"Confound the renegado! I have sprained
2. 682My left wing, he's so heavy; one would think
3. 683Some of his works about his neck were chained.
4. 684But to the point; while hovering o'er the brink
5. 685Of Skiddaw (where as usual it still rained),
6. 686I saw a taper, far below me, wink,
7. 687And stooping, caught this fellow at a libel--
8. 688No less on History--than the Holy Bible.

1. 689"The former is the Devil's scripture, and
2. 690The latter yours, good Michael: so the affair
3. 691Belongs to all of us, you understand.
4. 692I snatched him up just as you see him there,
5. 693And brought him off for sentence out of hand:
6. 694I've scarcely been ten minutes in the air--
7. 695At least a quarter it can hardly be:
8. 696I dare say that his wife is still at tea."

1. 697Here Satan said, "I know this man of old,
2. 698And have expected him for some time here;
3. 699A sillier fellow you will scarce behold,
4. 700Or more conceited in his petty sphere:
5. 701But surely it was not worth while to fold
6. 702Such trash below your wing, Asmodeus dear:
7. 703We had the poor wretch safe (without being bored
8. 704With carriage) coming of his own accord.

1. 705"But since he's here, let's see what he has done."
2. 706"Done!" cried Asmodeus, "he anticipates
3. 707The very business you are now upon,
4. 708And scribbles as if head clerk to the Fates.
5. 709Who knows to what his ribaldry may run,
6. 710When such an ass as this, like Balaam's, prates?"
7. 711"Let's hear," quoth Michael, "what he has to say:
8. 712You know we're bound to that in every way."

1. 713Now the bard, glad to get an audience, which
2. 714By no means often was his case below,
3. 715Began to cough, and hawk, and hem, and pitch
4. 716His voice into that awful note of woe
5. 717To all unhappy hearers within reach
6. 718Of poets when the tide of rhyme's in flow;
7. 719But stuck fast with his first hexameter,
8. 720Not one of all whose gouty feet would stir.

1. 721But ere the spavined dactyls could be spurred
2. 722Into recitative, in great dismay
3. 723Both Cherubim and Seraphim were heard
4. 724To murmur loudly through their long array;
5. 725And Michael rose ere he could get a word
6. 726Of all his foundered verses under way,
7. 727And cried, "For God's sake stop, my friend! 'twere best--
8. 728'Non Di, non homines'--you know the rest."

1. 729A general bustle spread throughout the throng,
2. 730Which seemed to hold all verse in detestation;
3. 731The Angels had of course enough of song
4. 732When upon service; and the generation
5. 733Of ghosts had heard too much in life, not long
6. 734Before, to profit by a new occasion:
7. 735The Monarch, mute till then, exclaimed, "What! what!
8. 736Pye come again? No more--no more of that!"

1. 737The tumult grew; an universal cough
2. 738Convulsed the skies, as during a debate,
3. 739When Castlereagh has been up long enough
4. 740(Before he was first minister of state,
5. 741I mean--the slaves hear now); some cried "Off, off!"
6. 742As at a farce; till, grown quite desperate,
7. 743The Bard Saint Peter prayed to interpose
8. 744(Himself an author) only for his prose.

1. 745The varlet was not an ill-favoured knave;
2. 746A good deal like a vulture in the face,
3. 747With a hook nose and a hawk's eye, which gave
4. 748A smart and sharper-looking sort of grace
5. 749To his whole aspect, which, though rather grave,
6. 750Was by no means so ugly as his case;
7. 751But that, indeed, was hopeless as can be,
8. 752Quite a poetic felony "de se."

1. 753Then Michael blew his trump, and stilled the noise
2. 754With one still greater, as is yet the mode
3. 755On earth besides; except some grumbling voice,
4. 756Which now and then will make a slight inroad
5. 757Upon decorous silence, few will twice
6. 758Lift up their lungs when fairly overcrowed;
7. 759And now the Bard could plead his own bad cause,
8. 760With all the attitudes of self-applause.

1. 761He said--(I only give the heads)--he said,
2. 762He meant no harm in scribbling; 'twas his way
3. 763Upon all topics; 'twas, besides, his bread,
4. 764Of which he buttered both sides; 'twould delay
5. 765Too long the assembly (he was pleased to dread),
6. 766And take up rather more time than a day,
7. 767To name his works--he would but cite a few--
8. 768"Wat Tyler"--"Rhymes on Blenheim"--"Waterloo."

1. 769He had written praises of a Regicide;
2. 770He had written praises of all kings whatever;
3. 771He had written for republics far and wide,
4. 772And then against them bitterer than ever;
5. 773For pantisocracy he once had cried
6. 774Aloud, a scheme less moral than 'twas clever;
7. 775Then grew a hearty anti-jacobin--
8. 776Had turned his coat--and would have turned his skin.

1. 777He had sung against all battles, and again
2. 778In their high praise and glory; he had called
3. 779Reviewing "the ungentle craft," and then
4. 780Became as base a critic as e'er crawled--
5. 781Fed, paid, and pampered by the very men
6. 782By whom his muse and morals had been mauled:
7. 783He had written much blank verse, and blanker prose,
8. 784And more of both than any body knows.

1. 785He had written Wesley's life:--here turning round
2. 786To Satan, "Sir, I'm ready to write yours,
3. 787In two octavo volumes, nicely bound,
4. 788With notes and preface, all that most allures
5. 789The pious purchaser; and there's no ground
6. 790For fear, for I can choose my own reviewers:
7. 791So let me have the proper documents,
8. 792That I may add you to my other saints."

1. 793Satan bowed, and was silent. "Well, if you,
2. 794With amiable modesty, decline
3. 795My offer, what says Michael? There are few
4. 796Whose memoirs could be rendered more divine.
5. 797Mine is a pen of all work; not so new
6. 798As it was once, but I would make you shine
7. 799Like your own trumpet. By the way, my own
8. 800Has more of brass in it, and is as well blown.

1. 801"But talking about trumpets, here's my 'Vision!'
2. 802Now you shall judge, all people--yes--you shall
3. 803Judge with my judgment! and by my decision
4. 804Be guided who shall enter heaven or fall.
5. 805I settle all these things by intuition,
6. 806Times present, past, to come--Heaven--Hell--and all,
7. 807Like King Alfonso . When I thus see double,
8. 808I save the Deity some worlds of trouble."

1. 809He ceased, and drew forth an MS.; and no
2. 810Persuasion on the part of Devils, Saints,
3. 811Or Angels, now could stop the torrent; so
4. 812He read the first three lines of the contents:
5. 813But at the fourth, the whole spiritual show
6. 814Had vanished, with variety of scents,
7. 815Ambrosial and sulphureous, as they sprang,
8. 816Like lightning, off from his "melodious twang."

1. 817Those grand heroics acted as a spell;
2. 818The Angels stopped their ears and plied their pinions;
3. 819The Devils ran howling, deafened, down to Hell;
4. 820The ghosts fled, gibbering, for their own dominions--
5. 821(For 'tis not yet decided where they dwell,
6. 822And I leave every man to his opinions);
7. 823Michael took refuge in his trump--but, lo!
8. 824His teeth were set on edge, he could not blow!

1. 825Saint Peter, who has hitherto been known
2. 826For an impetuous saint, upraised his keys,
3. 827And at the fifth line knocked the poet down;
4. 828Who fell like Phaeton, but more at ease,
5. 829Into his lake, for there he did not drown;
6. 830A different web being by the Destinies
7. 831Woven for the Laureate's final wreath, whene'er
8. 832Reform shall happen either here or there.

1. 833He first sank to the bottom--like his works,
2. 834But soon rose to the surface--like himself;
3. 835For all corrupted things are buoyed like corks,
4. 836By their own rottenness, light as an elf,
5. 837Or wisp that flits o'er a morass: he lurks,
6. 838It may be, still, like dull books on a shelf,
7. 839In his own den, to scrawl some "Life" or "Vision,"
8. 840As Welborn says--"the Devil turned precisian."

1. 841As for the rest, to come to the conclusion
2. 842Of this true dream, the telescope is gone
3. 843Which kept my optics free from all delusion,
4. 844And showed me what I in my turn have shown;
5. 845All I saw farther, in the last confusion,
6. 846Was, that King George slipped into Heaven for one;
7. 847And when the tumult dwindled to a calm,
8. 848I left him practising the hundredth psalm.